Cries of the Silent

I’m in a self-existential crisis. Do I even exist?

According to Twitter, the answer is yes… and no.

Try performing a search on Twitter. As long as you select “All tweets“, you’ll see mostly everyone in the world who has typed your search phrase in a recent tweet. The only missing tweets are those who’ve set their profile to “protected”, and any tweets from (public) account @jiannmeng.

Which is of course, my account.

Here’s an example: as part of the Otak-Otak Internship Program, we have been bribed coerced asked to tweet about the program as much as possible. Preferably with the hashtag #2013OtakOtak. You won’t find any of my tweets there.

Even worse, searching a username finds you all tweets by that person, and everyone who mentioned that user. Compare the searches for, say, @victordonttweet and @jiannmeng. Evidently Twitter thinks Victor is more important than me, which is proof that there is an error in their search algorithm.

What does this mean for me?

1. I’ll never be a Twitter celebrity. My well-crafted, intelligent, funny tweets (all┬ámost of them) will never be seen by the general public. Only those who follow me will ever taste the drops of wisdom I produce.

2. I will never win anything from a hashtag competition. No free smartphones or vouchers for me.

3. My very existence continues to be questioned. I exist on Twitter yet my voice is never heard publicly. But existence on Twitter is, by design, characterised by the tendency to shout very loudly about everything without regard to its actual relevance. I have done, still do, and will continue to do that, but I will never reach the upper echelons of the Twitterazzi.

Note: I wanted to complain about this on Twitter, but…