Archive for the ‘random’ Category

  • Pronouciation

    1

    Found something during my trip on the Internet:

    Dearest creature in creation,
    Study English pronunciation.
    I will teach you in my verse
    Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
    I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
    Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
    Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
    So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
    Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
    Dies and diet, lord and word,
    Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
    (Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
    Now I surely will not plague you
    With such words as plaque and ague.
    But be careful how you speak:
    Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
    Cloven, oven, how and low,
    Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
    Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
    Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
    Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
    Exiles, similes, and reviles;
    Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
    Solar, mica, war and far;
    One, anemone, Balmoral,
    Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
    Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
    Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
    Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
    Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
    Blood and flood are not like food,
    Nor is mould like should and would.
    Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
    Toward, to forward, to reward.
    And your pronunciation’s OK
    When you correctly say croquet,
    Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
    Friend and fiend, alive and live.
    Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
    And enamour rhyme with hammer.
    River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
    Doll and roll and some and home.
    Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
    Neither does devour with clangour.
    Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
    Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
    Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
    And then singer, ginger, linger,
    Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
    Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
    Query does not rhyme with very,
    Nor does fury sound like bury.
    Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
    Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
    Though the differences seem little,
    We say actual but victual.
    Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
    Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
    Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
    Dull, bull, and George ate late.
    Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
    Science, conscience, scientific.
    Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
    Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
    We say hallowed, but allowed,
    People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
    Mark the differences, moreover,
    Between mover, cover, clover;
    Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
    Chalice, but police and lice;
    Camel, constable, unstable,
    Principle, disciple, label.
    Petal, panel, and canal,
    Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
    Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
    Senator, spectator, mayor.
    Tour, but our and succour, four.
    Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
    Sea, idea, Korea, area,
    Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
    Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
    Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
    Compare alien with Italian,
    Dandelion and battalion.
    Sally with ally, yea, ye,
    Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
    Say aver, but ever, fever,
    Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
    Heron, granary, canary.
    Crevice and device and aerie.
    Face, but preface, not efface.
    Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
    Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
    Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
    Ear, but earn and wear and tear
    Do not rhyme with here but ere.
    Seven is right, but so is even,
    Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
    Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
    Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
    Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
    Is a paling stout and spikey?
    Won’t it make you lose your wits,
    Writing groats and saying grits?
    It’s a dark abyss or tunnel:
    Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
    Islington and Isle of Wight,
    Housewife, verdict and indict.
    Finally, which rhymes with enough,
    Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
    Hiccough has the sound of cup.
    My advice is to give up!!!

    Source

  • Boxes

    0

    Boxes, I have them.

    …at least twice I have said, “I’m going to buy boxes,” and people give me that funny look and ask me why I’m buying boxers.

  • Buzz…. Buzz…. Buzz….

    0

    Do you know the sound a phone makes when it’s on vibrate? It goes, “buzz, buzz, buzz…”. Right now, there’s a phone on the floor above me which has been buzzing for about an hour. Non-stop.

    Insanity approaches.

  • E-mail

    0

    Gmail does a really good job of blocking spam. But it has failed me today >:(

    Dear Sir,

    We are working with North-based local miners’ of gold. We‘re looking for very different buyers of gold (Au-metal) which is available for immediate and outright sale to any serious buyer(s) or agent; or partners.

    From late last year’s mining activity; we have available for sale:

    Commodity: Aurum Utallum (Au)

    Form :    Gold Dust

    Purity :    92.7% Minimum Value

    Fineness  : 22+ carats

    Origin :     Sierra Leone

    Price :      $18,500 per kilo

    Assay : Final Assay to be made at and by Buyer’s chosen Refinery and this value will accepted by both Buyer and seller.

    If you’re interested, we’re ready and willing to sale and enter into long term business relationship / partnership for mining or constant supply agreement.

    We offer Au Metal – Gold (Dust). We are working with the local people and assure our buyers/ agent/partners of steady supply of at least four (4) times in a year supply; and as such we can comfortably enter long term supply contracts with any buyer / agent/ partner.

    We’re open to options and conditions for fair and open business transaction, get in touch with us if you’re interested and needs more details.

    Contact us for more details regarding condition of sale /partnership / supply contract respectively.

    Waiting to hear from you.

    Thanks

    Yours faithfully,

    E.F. Bobor.

    So. If anyone needs gold dust… yeah.

  • Ow, Injury

    0

    Story: I went to use my parent’s toilet to wash my hands after eating delicious brownie. The sink area is quite wet, so as I stepped over a puddle of water, my leg slipped forwards and hit against the edge of the sink cupboard. I was like, “Ouch! That’s gonna leave a big swelling,” but my parents in the room were quite panicky. They thought I hit my head or something :/

    Anyways, it felt like crap at the start, then the pain wasn’t actually too bad. Then when I rested it actually got worse for a while before suddenly disappearing. Pain is strange that way.

    Here’s two pictures:

    It wasn't as bad as I though. Also, thank you fibrin and fibrinogen!

    It wasn't as bad as I though. Also, thank you fibrin and fibrinogen!

    It's a pretty bad swelling though.

    It's a pretty bad swelling though.

    Quite a silly post I reckon. But here’s a little game to cheer you up:

    Spot the moth!

    Spot the moth!

    And here’s a few lines of emptiness to prevent a spoiler of the answer.



    Actually, it’s not that blank. Hmm.



    *drum roll*



    Now do you see the moth?

    Now do you see the moth?

Page 2 of 4«1234»